Just Rewards
Bill Gates dies in a car accident.
He finds himself in Purgatory, being sized up by God.
"Well, Bill, I'm really confused
on this call. I'm not sure whether to send you to Heaven or Hell.
After all, you helped society enormously by putting a computer in almost
every home in America, yet you also created that ghastly Windows.
I'm going to do something I've never done before. I'm going to let
you decide where you want to go, Heaven or Hell."
Bill replied, "Well, what's the difference
between the two?"
God said, "I'm willing to let you
visit both places briefly, if it will help your decision."
"Fine, but where should I go first?"
"I'll leave that up to you."
"Okay then," said Bill, "Let's try
Hell first."
So Bill went to Hell. It was
a beautiful, clean, sandy beach with clear waters with lots of beautiful
women running around, playing in the water, laughing and frolicking about.
The sun was shining, the temperature perfect.
"This is great!" he told God. "If
this is Hell, I REALLY want to see Heaven!"
"Fine," said God, and off they went.
Heaven was a place high in the clouds,
with angels drifting about, playing harps and singing. It was nice,
but not as nice as Hell.
Bill thought for a quick minute,
and rendered his decision. "Hmmm. I think I'd prefer Hell,"
he told God.
"Fine," returned God, "as you desire."
So Bill Gates went to Hell.
Two weeks later, God decided to check
on the late billionaire to see how he was doing. When he got to Hell,
he found Bill shackled to a wall, screaming amongst hot flames in a dark
cave, being burned and tortured by demons.
"So, how's everything going?"
Bill responded, his voice filled
with anguish and disappointment, "This is awful! This is nothing
like the Hell I visited two weeks ago! I can't believe this is happening!
What happened to that other place, with the beaches and the beautiful women
playing in the water?"
"Oh," replied God. "That was
just the demo."
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